The concept of “meaning” is a powerful thing. It is an instinctive thing our brains do, assigning meaning to everything in order to make sense of things so that we can compartmentalize ideas, concepts, experiences, people, etc. However, we need to be aware of the type of meaning we attribute to certain things because sometimes this can create unnecessary stress.
We need to be open to the possibility that maybe there are things we will never know the real meaning of, and certainly there are things that during our life times, we might never know. These truths are better accepted early on in life.
I think most of us do accept big mysteries such as the creation of the world, or…the great mystery about life after death, or the existence of God. There are many out there who claim to know the answers to these questions, but some people aren’t so sure. Nonetheless, we accept these things as sort of “The Big Mysteries of Life” and in fact I think most of us have an actual compartment in our brains labeled “Mysteries”, wouldn’t you agree? I know I surely do!
So, why do we seem to accept these big mysteries but yet continue to refuse to accept smaller mysteries in our lives such as…why did this happen to me? why does this person act this way towards me? Why did this person leave me? Why am I feeling this way? Etc, etc, etc.
What if – for once, we looked at these smaller “unknowns” and instead of desperately trying to attach some kind of meaning to them…just for the moment, we accepted them as mysteries?
We might some day discover the truth of these things, and in a lot of cases we do end up finding out. However, if we just took some time to PAUSE and say to ourselves: “Ok, I don’t know why this happened to me. It doesn’t make any sense. I cannot understand it. But for right now…I am just going to step back and wait for things to unfold”
Trust me I know this is easier said than done, especially when something particularly awful happens to you. But it is a 100 times more painful to be sitting there tearing yourself apart trying to attach meaning to something you just do not have enough information about. Ultimately it is about trusting that even though you do not understand what happened or why…there is a greater purpose. It is about surrendering to the reality that you cannot and might never be able to explain it, but life goes on.
Maybe at some point we could even learn to appreciate the part that mystery plays in our lives. Maybe we could start to view it as a door to new perspectives. Even maybe as a silent healer…
Humbly,
M.